Sunday, March 28, 2010

Love and hate

This is the relationship I have with exercise. I love feeling more alert, more in control of my body but I hate the panting, sweat and very (did I mention VERY) sore muscles. I kicked my own butt yesterday, lower body workout (used the Biggest Loser Wii game) and today my ass and my thighs are cursing me with words even I don't use LOL. I'm very proud of myself for working myself that hard, I realized afterwards that I haven't exercised that hard since elementary school PE. For those of you that know me you realize it's hard for me to even say I'm proud of myself, I'm finally trying to allow myself to be that and admit it which I hope will lead to bigger and better things :-)

Wednesday, March 24, 2010


If you haven't caught on yet that lovely is dripping with sarcasm. I have discovered that medical coding, while mind numbingly boring, is a sign of the apocalypse...okay so maybe that's a bit drastic but it is a strange metaphor for everything that is wrong with our species at this stage of our evolution. {Do NOT comment to me regarding evolution vs. divine whatever, just DON'T} We nit pick things to death, and if you haven't looked at medical coding recently then you have no idea what I mean but trust me on this it is the most nit picky thing ever invented. Then there is health insurance, an utterly ridiculous idea that most civilized and uncivilized countries don't use. Why do we do this?? Money. The worst invention ever created by any sentient species in the universe. It is truly the root of all evil (well that and the blind insistence that my God is better than your God). If it weren't for money we probably wouldn't be as technologically advanced but I can almost guarantee we would be happier and more well adjusted. We have sacrificed happiness for money. I have some faith left in humanity and still believe that we would make the advances necessary without the financial gain part of it but then perhaps I'm just naive. Perhaps I'll stay that way because the day I stop believing that is the day I give up.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Ouch and Ugh

I'm full, hence the ugh, and I'm sore, hence the ouch. Ate too much dinner but enjoyed every little morsel LOL. I stepped it up a bit on the workout tonight and kicked my own ass, sniffle! Now I'm sore in more spots that I thought possible and I'm not looking forward to sleeping and letting all those muscles tighten up. I keep telling myself it's good for me and working (lost about 4 pounds, yay!) but my body keeps telling me to shut the hell up LOL!! Ah well, no pain no gain so to speak.
So much going on right now I havne't had much time or energy to pour out here but my brain is poking me saying it needs an outlet again so I will try to drag my poor little (snicker) body to my blog more often. Must go now though, it's time to watch Lost :-)

Wednesday, March 10, 2010


Sometimes, when we are tired or insecure, we use words that (I hope) we don't mean. We all have a perspective and each of us thinks that perspective is right. Instead of talking to people who have a unique perspective on a situation or someone who is simply good at listening we react in anger. That is all I will say tonight so I don't fall into the same trap.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Been a little busy...

Sorry guys, life has been a tad busy lately. I didn't realize how long it had been since my last post, I kinda freaked out when I saw the date LOL! I've been exercising, almost every day (took one off cause I was sick and yesterday off because I spent four hours of intense manual labor mucking horse stalls) :-) My doctor would be happy! Now I just need to work on the food angle all will be well. I haven't been writing much though, I have so many ideas in my head that I'm having a hard time sorting them out. It's hard to fit everything I want to do in a day when all this weight is literally weighing me down. It takes so much energy to get through work, working out, cooking, laundry, etc. that I don't have much left for more creative pursuits. I know that will improve as I lose the weight it's just a little disheartening at times know that there's something really cool inside my brain and no one else can see it yet. I hope that's the mark of a true writer and not just my ego talking. Perhaps it's my exhausted body yowling in pain (lol) that is making me a tad maudlin ;-)